“mama loves you baby, so much ~ you’re gonna have the sweetest dreams….”
I’m not the mom who tells my children they are “good boys”. And I’ve never told my children they are “bad”. Just like there is no black paint in my studio, the word “bad” just doesn’t come up when I’m talking to my boys about their actions.
I tell them they are sweet and I thank them for their kind behavior, a lot. I appreciate the dickens out of them, and I tell them quietly how important they are to me. I also let them reap their own consequences, positive or negative.
At the end of every night, I lay with my sons and sing them a song. A song I made up. I usually sing lyrics that I made up when my first son was a brand new baby ~ to the tune of Brahms Lullaby. But we get creative and add our own lyrics to the tune of any ol’ song. The song above is sung to the tune of an old cotton-picking folk song that my son learned at school 🙂
My point is… the last thing my boys hear before they drift off to sleep is their mama (or daddy) telling them through song that they are loved and special. To them it is a song, a groovy tune that helps them relax, but I feel like I’m subliminally injecting them with good vibes and respect. A way to share thoughts on their value, without outwardly telling them they are “good boys”.
What does “good” mean, anyway?
What do you think about the whole Good Kid/Bad Kid thing? Do children live up to our expectations if we tell them they are bad? Do they learn to expect and require another’s approval if we always tell them how good they are?
LET ME KNOW YOUR thoughts in the comment box below!
Love & Sincerely, Katie
above image: Sacred Space by Katie m. Berggren ~ snag a print of Sacred Space here